KADESH BARNEA

If you have not read the previous post, KADESH, I encourage you to do so.  While this post can stand alone, it is a chapter taken from my book, ENCOUNTER THE LIVING WORD, which follows the chapter and previous post, KADESH.

A PLACE OF DECISION

Just as Kadesh Barnea was a place of decision for the Israelites, each one of us now lives in the spiritual wilderness of Kadesh Barnea.  It is the threshold of intimate relationship with God where we will be faced with the decision to choose to love and fear the Lord, to serve Him with sincerity and faithfulness that comes from a new heart of humility and surrender; or to choose to go another way, following after the lusts of the flesh that come from a rebellious, prideful heart.

I encourage and caution you just as Joshua admonished God’s people in Joshua 24:14-31 that begins,  “Now therefore fear the Lord, and serve him in sincerity and in truth: and put away the gods which your fathers served on the other side of the flood, and in Egypt; and serve ye the Lord…”

The people of Israel did serve God in action during the life of Joshua and the elders with him, but their hearts did not change and they eventually failed.  In consequence, they were conquered by enemy nations, enslaved once again and scattered far from their Promised Land.

But God, in His mercy, brought them back around to the place of decision, a spiritual Kadesh Barnea.

KADESH

Tags

Grace, Holy, New name, Sanctuary

The following is a chapter taken from my book, ENCOUNTER THE LIVING WORD.

A NEW NAME

Some of my most amazing encounters with God are early in the morning.  It seems that Jesus likes to speak to me upon my waking, probably because He wants to implant the first thought in my mind before it gets too busy to listen.

As I awoke one particular morning not too long ago, I heard Jesus speak into my spirit, “Nancy, come into the Father’s throne room with Me.”

Suddenly I was in the spirit standing before Father God.  The first thought in my mind was that I was still in my pajamas!  I knelt at His feet feeling inadequately dressed, but I’ll never forget His delight in me, and the warm, cozy hues as if there was a fire blazing in the hearth, and the loving, peaceful, family atmosphere that was in that place at that moment.  I sensed the Holy Spirit while Jesus stood beside me.

The Father said, “Nancy stand up for I am giving you a new name.”

I stood and He spoke some Hebrew words that I didn’t understand, and then He said, “I now call you Kadesh.” He hesitated, and then as if He had an afterthought He added, “Barnea.”

And then my spirit was back in bed still reeling with the love, peace and joy of my Lord’s presence, His words ringing in my ears.  He had just given me a new name that was imprinted in my mind and heart!  I knew it was significant.  I wondered what “Kadesh Barnea” meant.

TWO TOMATO PLANTS

Tags

prayer, Responsibility, Tomato Plants

Early in the spring, we planted two heirloom tomato plants.  Both grew and developed beautiful leaves, and eventually both began blooming.  They appeared to be healthy, thriving plants; however, one had tomatoes and the other had none.  Not a one.

At prayer meeting one morning, the Lord told me to take out the fruitless tomato plant.  I realized that there was some spiritual significance to this, even though I wasn’t sure of the specifics at that time.

I came home and went to the garden.  I grabbed hold of that plant and pulled hard, trying to uproot it.  It did not budge.  Jim saw me and I mentioned that this fruitless plant had to go.  I went inside to get my gloves, and when I returned, the plant was gone.  Just that fast, Jim had cut it off at the roots.  I was surprised how he had responded so quickly to my desire without me even asking or expecting him to take care of it.  I thanked him and he asked, “Do you want me to remove the roots too?”  For some reason, I didn’t feel that it was the right time.  I said, “Later.”  Then I heard the Lord say, “Nancy, all you did was mention it and it was taken care of for you.”  I took note of this, for I knew it was important.

Zoom Interview Testimony

Tags

Freedom, healing, hope, Nancy Bowser, SRA, testimony

Link to Zoom Interview with Pastor Butch Paugh

Nancy shares her testimony on “A Call to Decision,” 6-6-20.  This is not for children.

MY TESTIMONY: Overcoming SRA

Tags

DID, Hope Healing and Freedom, Integration, Mind control, MK Ultra, MPD, Nancy Bowser, Programming, SRA

INTRODUCTION

Some people don’t believe that Satan is real, and some Christians don’t think that Satan can influence them when they are worshipping God.  Satan is real.  And if there is an open door in a Christian’s life, then Satan can and will influence them in some way.  All sin is an open door for enemy influence.  I am 60 years old and have been a Christian for 55 years.  I have had to learn how to shut the open doors in my life that others opened through abuse and rituals, doors that I opened through my own sin, and doors that were opened through generational sin that was passed down to me.  

In a nutshell, James 1:21 describes my story.  “Therefore, lay aside all filthiness and remaining wickedness, and receive with meekness the engrafted word which is able to save your souls.”  Jesus of Nazareth is the engrafted Word of God and He has become my Soul Redeemer who rescued me from the clutches of the devil.  Jesus has cleansed me from all my sin, and from all the sin that others have done against me according to 1 John 1:9b that says, “… the blood of Jesus Christ His Son cleanses us from all sin.”

In Christ, I am not only a survivor, but an overcomer.  The Lord Jesus has taken my wounded, soiled, fractured soul (my mind, will, emotions and subconscious), and has healed me spiritually, mentally, emotionally, and physically.  He has delivered me from demons and has made me whole.  I have overcome Satan’s influence and deception, and I live to honor and glorify my Father in heaven.  I stand firm in my faith by surrendering to Jesus, choosing to believe the truth rather than the lies, through repenting, renouncing, forgiving, trusting in and obeying God’s Word, and by relying on the power of the Holy Spirit.  Jesus and Holy Spirit have made their home in me!  I am a new creation in Christ Jesus and He is continually fashioning me into His image.  Praise God that this is the Lord’s plan for all of us! (John 16:33; 1 John 5:4-5) 

What some may find hard to believe is that there are people who worship Satan.  They are servants of Satan, dedicated to him wholeheartedly.  I am sad to say that they take their worship more seriously than many Christians take their worship of God.  Satan is after the souls of mankind.  His human and demon counterparts are his soul hunters, who will tear the souls of those they capture into pieces.  The Bible describes this in Ezekiel 13:18.  Why?  Their agenda is manipulation and control, power and dominion.

I don’t share my testimony for sensationalism, but if my story will give hope to even just one person bound up in this web of deception, then it is worth it.  If sharing my story will encourage more people to pray, to cry out to God on behalf of these suffering such atrocities, then it is worth it.  God loves us no matter what we have done or experienced.  Whatever our situation, the truth is that Jesus Christ is our Soul Redeemer, Healer and Deliverer.  He is our only hope.

HARRIET’S PASSIONATE SPEECH

Tags

"I'm gonna be free or die", Freedom, Harriet Tubman, Slavery

“I’M GONNA BE FREE OR DIE!”

These are the iconic words spoken by Cynthia Ervio who played the part of Harriet Tubman in the newly released movie, “HARRIET.”[1]

Harriet Tubman has been one of my hero’s since I first heard about her in a Junior High History class.  Even though I didn’t have conscious memories of Satanic Ritual Abuse at that time, part of me related to the evils of human slavery and its effects.  Harriet’s passion for freedom and then her determination to go back and free as many others as possible has been my heart’s desire as I have fought my own way to freedom.  I pray that the Lord will ignite many more with the passion for freedom.  Spiritual, emotional, mental and physical freedom.

Even though the following words may not be as powerful in writing as they were when Cynthia spoke them in the movie, I want to share them in hopes that all who read them will be inspired.

CRAZY?

Am I crazy?  Or is this reality?

How I hope that the nightmares that continue to haunt my days are only dreams, even if they originate from the torment of demons.

How I hope that the distant voices speaking words that seem to come from some long buried grave within my mind are only the product of my imagination.

How I hope the smells that suddenly assault my nostrils and disappear as quickly are derived from an unseen, yet present source and not from a memory in the past.

How I hope that the morbid and obscene thoughts, snapshots and video clips that invade my mind at random times are only horrifically fanciful thoughts and not reality.

Am I crazy insane?

MY PLAN: Hope, Healing and Freedom from SRA, etc.

Tags

Nancy Bowser, Repressed Memories

Note:  This article is the same as “Dealing with Memories and Emotions” posted under “Articles of Hope, Healing and Freedom.”

As children, when something very traumatic happens and there is no hope of rescue, it is not uncommon for them to dissociate a part of their mind from the event, or to repress the memory, emotions, and possibly even the physical sensations of that experience. Because they are not able to deal with the trauma, they separate that memory and its pain from themselves in order to survive. This is a God given defense mechanism, however, this tool that allows survival in children, eventually breaks down and hinders their ability to successfully function in the real world.

Because a part of their mind and emotions are stuck in that past experience, even though they may not be conscious of it, this memory influences their perceptions of life, how they respond to things, and the choices they make. As adults, pieces of their hidden past usually begin to come into consciousness causing mental, emotional and sometimes even physical chaos as the walls of dissociation begin to break down.

When this happens, a person may experience flashbacks as pictures or videos that play through their mind of events they may have no recollection of. They may feel certain emotions that they don’t understand. They may even experience body memories as unexplainable physical pain, sensations or smells assault them.

As long as they do not accept the experience as a part of themselves or are walling off the pain, they are in bondage to the past. Because the past is still influencing the present and will bleed over into the future, remembering is the beginning of the healing process. It is the beginning that will ultimately allow them to “forget what lies behind and to strain forward to what lies ahead.” Remembering allows them to empty themselves of the pain of the past, renew their minds, and learn to handle difficult situations in a Godly way. (Philippians 3:13)

Hold Me In Your Arms

a love song for Jesus.

A Dose of Reality and a Call for Prayer from Amy Carmichael

Tags

Amy Carmichael, Atrocities, Human Trafficking, India

I am struck with the comparisons of what Amy Carmichael discovered as to the true state of “Things As They Are” (the title of her first book) in India in the early 1900’s, and the true state of “things as they are” here in America now.  Pedophilia, human trafficking and slavery, mind control and programming, domestic violence, murder, government cover up, demon worship including the marriage of young children to the to gods and what we would call Satanic Ritual Abuse, animal and human sacrifice, overall blindness through such strong belief in deception that there is desensitization against the truth, and the list goes on.  People in America did not want to know the truth then, for it was too horrific, and yet she spoke it out, just as those of us who know this same reality in the US today must speak out as well.  I have copied a small portion of chapter 25, for its relevance is applicable in this present generation.

Amy writes:  “There are men and women in India to whom many a day is a nightmare, and this fair land an Inferno, because of what they know of the wrong that is going on. For that is the dreadful part of it. It is not like the burning alive of the widows, it is not a horror passed. It is going on steadily day and night. Sunlight, moonlight, and darkness pass, the one changing into the other; but all the time they are passing, this Wrong holds the hours with firm and strong hands, and uses them for its purpose—the murder of little girls.