STORYTIME With NONIE: Amy Carmichael

In this series of videos, Nonie shows how God speaks to little children, how He loves them, has a plan for their lives, and wants them to follow Him.

Note: This first video is an intro for adults. The other four are for children. To view the videos in the playlist, click the “1/5” in the top right hand corner of the screen…

Or go to Nancy’s Youtube at: https://www.youtube.com/user/nancybowser/featured

But Am I Really Dead?

Ok, so I was tested and tried and found wanting.

This morning I went out to water and yard and the crazy hose was twisted so badly that it would not reach the bushes that were craving a drink.  I was in a hurry, and it didn’t matter how hard I yanked, that hose would not straighten out.  I got so mad that I had visions of killing the rebellious hose!  Like slashing it to bits would solve the problem! 

Of course it wasn’t just the hose that had brought out this violent overreaction.  That was just the last straw, so to speak.  

And then I heard the still, quiet voice of the Lord.  “Nancy, are you really dead?”  

The scripture from the day before came rushing back into my mind. “When we were in the flesh, the passions of sin, through the law, worked in our members to bear fruit leading to death. But now we are delivered from the law, having died to things in which we were bound, so that we may serve in newness of the Spirit, and not in the oldness of the letter of the law” (Romans 7:5-6).

I hung my head in repentance.  “No Lord, I guess I’m not, because if I were dead, anger and frustration wouldn’t be alive in me.”  

In allowing my sin nature to rise up, I was not only giving place to the devil, but I was grieving the Holy Spirit.  I was certainly not bearing the fruit of the Spirit!  Galatians 5 and Ephesians 4:27, 30-32 came to mind.   

As I began to untangle the poor hose, Holy Spirit conviction helped me recognize the true source of my frustration that I hadn’t taken notice of before.  I confessed my need for God’s help and my desire to rely on Him. 

I had to laugh at God’s way of revealing things in me that weren’t dead, things that would produce fruit leading to death.  I made a conscious choice to walk in the Spirit so that I would not fulfill the lust of the flesh, but instead will produce the fruit of the Spirit which are love, joy, peace, patience, gentleness, goodness, faithfulness, meekness and self-control. (Galatians 5:16, 22-23)

Thank you Father for Your great love and patience.  Help me to daily put the death the things in me that are not of Your Kingdom, and to tend to my spiritual garden even better than I do my physical one.  In Jesus’ name, Amen.

I’m Already Dead

Romans 7:6 says, “But now we are delivered from the law, having died to things in which we were bound, so that we may serve in newness of the Spirit, and not in the oldness of the letter of the law.”

As I read this passage this morning, the words “having died to things in which we were bound,” brought a word picture to mind.  I saw my soul-self bound with cords from which there was no escape.  And then I died.  I ceased to care about the cords or why they were there.  My soul-body began to deteriorate as dead things do, and with that state of decay, the cords loosened until finally, as I was reduced to a heap of ash, the cords had no more hold on me at all.  I literally had died to the things that had me bound, such as allowing my life to be fueled and ruled by ungodly and unstable emotions, my mindsets based on my own desires, lies and legalism, and my sinful habits.  

And then the word picture changed as I read the next part of the verse, “so that we may serve in the newness of the Spirit.”  Jesus picked up my ashes, reformed me in His likeness of righteousness which is His way of thinking, feeling and acting, and then I was able to serve Him wholeheartedly through the newness of my spirit and soul, the purpose for which He created me. 

I once heard a preacher/evangelist tell about an experience he had.  I’m sorry that I can’t recall his name.  He was in Columbia and the Holy Spirit told him to deliver a message to a certain drug lord.  As you can imagine, this servant of God was not happy about this assignment.  But he went where the Lord directed him, and found himself at a locked gate of a compound.  He began yelling and calling out, and soon the gate automatically opened, then shut behind him locking him in with no way of escape.  

As he stood contemplating his surroundings and situation, three large guard dogs came charging toward him.  As human fear washed over him, his spirit cried out, “Lord, I know you didn’t send me here to be killed by dogs.  What do I do?”  The thought to crouch down on their level came to him, so he immediately got down and began calling the dogs like they were old friends.  The dogs, which were now only seconds away from him, stopped dead in their tracks, uncertain of what to do.  They hung their heads and began whimpering.  He kept calling to them to come to him, and finally, one ventured close enough for him to scratch its ears.  Enjoying the attention, it laid down on its back for a nice tummy rub, and soon all three killer dogs were reduced to playful pups.

The Cockroach from Heaven

God’s nature and character is revealed throughout His Word.  He is love.  He is good, righteous, forgiving, faithful, true and holy, and so much more.  But I believe that there is one attribute that is not specifically mentioned.  His humor.  

Daddy passed away at home on May 2^nd, 2021, at 8:30 pm.  There is nothing funny or humorous about that.  However, as I look back on that moment, in my vivid imagination, I can hear the Father in heaven talking with Jesus.  

“Son,” says Father God.  “My son Jim is coming home in a few earthly moments, and I’d like to leave a special reminder of My love and care for his family.  Do You have any ideas?”  Jesus smiles.  “Yes Father, I believe that I know the perfect thing.  I will send a cockroach, for You see,…”  As His plan unfolds, the Father’s laugh joyously resonates throughout heaven…  

Soon after Daddy left his earthly body, the Hospice nurse came to prepare him for the mortuary.  As I stepped out onto the front deck to welcome her, I noticed a very large, black cockroach.  This was unusual, for we have lived here eighteen years and have never seen a cockroach like that.  As the evening wore on and people came and went, that cockroach sat unmoving through it all.

When Daddy’s body was gone and we were sitting together in the living room, I thought of the cockroach.  “Seth, did you see that giant cockroach on the deck?” I asked my son.  He immediately went to look at it.  It had to be at least two inches long.  He took a picture of it with his hand beside it, and still it did not move.  We talked about the oddity of the thing, and when the thought crossed my mind wondering if we should kill it, I realized that I didn’t want to.  I was too tired to process why I felt comfort instead of revulsion at such a thing, which I must admit was surprising to me even in my exhaustion.  

In the morning, the cockroach was gone.  But suddenly, I was captivated by God’s message and amazed at His sense of humor, and I had to laugh!  Three days before Daddy died, I had read a chapter out of my new book to him.^[1]  It was a memory of God’s love and faithfulness that He had shown to our family when we were in Mexico for a church conference.  Daddy, Mother and I reminisced about this experience with fondness.

I had been ten years old at the time.  Here we were in a foreign country, and we had run out of money.  We didn’t have much to eat, and we didn’t have enough money for another night in a hotel.  I remember wondering if we would be sleeping in the filthy street when my brother found some money in the gutter.  He gave it to Daddy, and I thought that God was providing for us.  But Daddy put that money in the church offering!  He said that the people there needed it more than we did.  He said that God would take care of us.  That night, we were invited to sleep in the bishop’s hotel room with him.  I remember lying on the floor, watching the giant black cockroaches on the walls, and in spite of my fear of bugs, I slept peacefully. 

At the end of that chapter I had mentioned how giant black cockroaches now remind me of God’s love and faithfulness.  

So you see, God sent that specific cockroach to remind me that even though my Daddy was no longer with us, Jesus was with us, and He would never leave us.  He had always been faithful, and He would forever be our loving, faithful Father.

Hebrews 11:1.

“Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.”

Heavenly Father, thank You for Your love and care.  Thank You for Your continued faithfulness.  Help me to live by faith like Daddy did, to remain faithful to You like Daddy was, to grow in my love for You and others, to carry on the mission of spreading the gospel, of preaching and teaching Your Kingdom truth found in the Word of God, of healing and delivering and doing what Jesus did in obedience to the Father in the power of the Holy Spirit.  

In Jesus’ name, Amen.

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^[1] Nancy Bowser, “Jesus Said, ‘When the Coffee’s Gone…,’” Amazon, 2021, p. 142.

Jesus Said, “WHEN THE COFFEE’S GONE…”

Sold on Amazon @ https://smile.amazon.com/Jesus-Said-WHEN-COFFEES-GONE/dp/B08Z5LSLTK/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=Jesus+Said%2C+When+the+Coffee%27s+Gone&qid=1621685729&sr=8-1

Yahweh’s creative ability to get our attention always amazes me. He speaks to my heart and mind in many ways, although mainly through His Word, and He especially seems to enjoy teaching me lessons from His creation. The Lord God is all about relationship with His people. All good relationships consist of two-way communication, and learning to hear, recognize and obey God’s voice has been a life journey for me.

Since I love to write, over the years I have recorded some of the things the Holy Spirit has spoken to me about, and I have compiled them in this sometimes serious and sometimes humorous conglomeration of narratives. Yes, He’s used donkeys, dogs, snakes, scorpions, cats, pigs, oak trees, and one of my favorites…a homeless man who kissed me on top of my head.

May you be encouraged to seek a deeper relationship with our Heavenly Father, Jesus the Son and Holy Spirit as you come along with me on my personal spiritual journey.

My Daddy’s Face

In memory of my Dad, James DeSpain.

As a little girl, I knew my Daddy’s face.  I remember walking through lots of big people’s legs at church searching for my Daddy.  I remember looking up into each face until I found his.  I would yank on his pant leg, and he would reach down and pick me up without missing a word in the conversation he was having.  I would look at his beautiful face, and think how I loved that large mole on his forehead.  No other daddy had that distinguishing mark.  As I looked into his face, I knew I was safe and loved.  I saw heaven in my Daddy’s face.

It’s funny how snapshots of Daddy’s life and the expressions on his face now fly through my mind.  Daddy praying.  Daddy singing.  Playing the harmonica.  Making people laugh with his dry humor.  Preparing a sermon. Preaching.  Riding his motorcycle.  Visiting people in their homes.  Counseling.  Telling Bible stories at Good News Clubs.  Hiking.  Stopping to bless families and babies anytime we were in public.  Eating his favorite things, hamburgers and Chinese food.  Studying his Greek. I can see Daddy slightly cock his head and ask, “How is it with your soul?”  I can see his intense expression as he battled through his love/hate relationship with his computer.  Writing.  Napping.  The peace in his eyes as his health continued to decline.  The appreciation he had for Mother and her devoted care.  And more recently, I see Daddy sitting in his chair by the window where he prayed and worshipped God, where he loved to watch the donkeys, rabbits and birds, and where he would wave to me as I drove down the steep driveway past his window.  As my memory looks back on all these things, I realize how often I saw heaven in my Daddy’s face.

Now, my Daddy lay struggling for breath upon his deathbed.  His face was skin and bones, sunken.  His eyes were slightly open, but were cloudy and unresponsive.  His breathing was labored and uneven.  I wondered where God was.  How long would He let my Daddy, who had faithfully loved and served Him suffer like this?  I wondered what it would be like when Jesus came for him.  Would the Lord allow me to glimpse Jesus or heaven or angels? 

Over the last few days of Daddy’s decline I had grown accustomed to listening to his breathing and counting the seconds between each breath.  I was in the living room with mother and Seth when I realized that I hadn’t heard him take a breath in a few seconds.  I looked in, expecting his body to suddenly gasp for air as he had done so many times before that day, but this time was different. 

His mouth was moving as if he was hoping to catch a breath or was trying to say something, but he didn’t look anxious.  As we gathered around his bed we knew that there would be no more breaths coming from his earthly body.  

We began to sing one of his favorite songs, “Jesus Loves Me.”  

Seth said, “Grandpa, you are going to hear Jesus say, ‘Well done, My good and faithful servant.’”

Daddy’s mouth continued to open and close without seeming to struggle.  Was he saying that he loved us?  We were crying with joy in our hearts that he was finally on his way to heaven and would not have to suffer any longer, and we were all telling him how much we loved him.

I wondered what his spirit was seeing, what he was experiencing.  I thought about looking up to see if I could see the angels above us, but I didn’t want to take my eyes off of Daddy’s precious face. 

We watched as his mouth moved more slowly, and the pulse in his neck grow weaker until both finally stopped and Daddy’s eyes closed for the last time.  We watched as his life peacefully shifted from this earthly realm to his heavenly home.  

No, I hadn’t seen Jesus or angels, but in that moment, I knew that once again, I had seen heaven in my Daddy’s face.   

A Meek and Quiet Spirit

Tags

Beatitudes, Escape, Meekness, Quiet, trust

It had been an especially long, difficult week and I just wanted to run away and escape.  Not that I would, but I have to admit that I was in the thick of this temptation when my phone notified me of a text.  A very precious friend who had no idea what was going on in my life explained that the Lord had just laid 1 Peter 3:3-4 on her mind for me, and so she was passing it along.

It said, “Whose adorning let it not be that outward adorning of plaiting the hair, and of wearing of gold, or of putting on of apparel; But let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price” (1 Peter 3:3-4, KJV).

I was challenged to evaluate my own “hidden man” or nature, and so I looked up the words meek and quiet in the Strong’s Concordance.  As I studied, I was overwhelmed at the way the Holy Spirit was directing me through the temptation. 

The word meek (G4235 and G4239) means gentle, humble, mild.  The Outline of Biblical Usage in the Strong’s said, “Meekness toward God is that disposition of spirit in which we accept His dealings with us as good, and therefore without disputing or resisting. In the OT, the meek are those wholly relying on God rather than their own strength to defend against injustice. Thus, meekness toward evil people means knowing God is permitting the injuries they inflict, that He is using them to purify His elect, and that He will deliver His elect in His time (Isaiah 41:17, Luke 18:1-8). Gentleness or meekness is the opposite to self-assertiveness and self-interest. It stems from trust in God’s goodness and control over the situation. The gentle person is not occupied with self at all. This is a work of the Holy Spirit, not of the human will (Galatians 5:23).” 

The word quiet (G2272) means “tranquil.  Akin to sit.  Keeping one’s seat (sedentary: inactive, deskbound), still (undisturbed, undisturbing).”  It is from G1476:  “Sitting, sedentary; firm, immovable, steadfast.”  And from G2192:  “To hold one’s self to a thing, to lay hold of a thing, to adhere or cling to, to be closely joined to a person or a thing.”

I cried because I had to admit that the hidden nature of my heart was not adorned with meekness.  I was relying on my own strength and was not trusting in God’s goodness or His control.  My heart was convicted as I realized how I had become so occupied with self, full of finding a self-solving solution, which if I complied, would leave a wake of destruction behind me.  

And then I had to laugh!  The Holy Spirit was literally telling me to sit down and shut up, to fully rely on God and let Him take care of everything, even the bad or difficult things that have happened or are happening.  There would be no running away for me!  I chose my Faithful Father’s way of escape that would come through fully surrendering myself to Him and allowing Him to work in me, to change me (1 Corinthians 10:13).

I realized that no matter what others have done to me, no matter what situation I find myself in, no mater how I feel, I must not take matters into my own hands or try to fix it even if it sounds like a good idea or the right thing to do.  God is using all these things, even the evil that others may have done to purify that hidden place in my heart, to change my old nature into His new nature.  I must let all that go, crucify it, and die to myself.  I must stop all selfishness and selfish plans and ambitions.  I must trust God’s goodness to take control of the situation, and must not trust my own will, but rather be obedient to God and His will.  This is the example that Jesus set before us through His life and death.

God’s will was clearly telling me to sit down!  Be still and deskbound, be firm, immovable and steadfast (committed, dedicated, persistent, unwavering) in being so joined to Jesus that I adhere myself to Him, cling to Him, relying on Him, trust in Him, and obey only Him.  

I must remember that this is the work of the Holy Spirit in me.  And yet the Holy Spirit will not work unless I choose to disengage myself from self, and to engage myself in clinging to Jesus, sitting at His feet, choosing to stay there, immovable, and deskbound in studying Him and His Word.  Until He tells me to move.

Matthew 5 came to mind.  Jesus left the crowds of people behind and went up into a mountain.  After He was set, after He had been there awhile, the disciples went to Him and He began to teach them.  Meekness is one of the beatitudes that Jesus taught.  “Blessed are the meek: for they shall inherit the earth” (Matthew 5:5).  I can see myself sitting on that mountain being taught and trained by Jesus like the disciples were.  I don’t know how long they sat there.  I don’t know how long I’ll sit here.  But I choose to trust in and rely on the Holy Spirit for my strength and guidance.  I choose to crucify my way and to be obedient to God’s way.  I choose to be joined to Jesus, to follow Him.  Amen.  

This Way!

Tags

Abide in Christ, Avoid Poison, Kadesh, Listen and Obey

“Your ears shall hear a word behind you, saying, ‘This is the way, walk in it,’ whenever you turn to the right hand and when you turn to the left”  (Isaiah 30:21)

I’ll share one last lesson from Kadesh. 

All dogs eat things that are obnoxiously nasty to us.  Like dead squirrels.  Unfortunately, Kadesh is no different from any other dog in this matter.  

I couldn’t understand why Kadesh didn’t want to eat her breakfast.  Or her lunch.  Or dinner.  She obviously had a tummy ache.  I tried to think what could have upset her stomach, and I thought back to our morning walk.  She had picked up something along the way and eaten it.  She hadn’t let me get close enough to take it from her, but I was pretty sure it was the left-over rotten corpse of a squirrel. 

And that’s when it hit me.  Our neighbor puts out squirrel poison!  I completely understand why he does this, as the squirrel population is off the charts.  But I felt terrible that I hadn’t thought of it before, and now Kadesh had to suffer the after-effects of eating the poison.

Kadesh doesn’t understand that if she eats a squirrel, she may be eating poison.  She is just doing what comes natural to her.  In order to protect her, I considered keeping her on a leash at all times, but then I thought about how well she has learned to obey and comes when we call her.  Most of the time, that is. 

Kadesh has learned to respond to our call when we say, “This way!”  When she hits the boundary line, we call out, “This way, Kadesh!” and she turns back toward us.  When she gets distracted and is on the trail of some prey and we call out, “Kadesh, this way!”  She looks up at us, then looks longingly after the trail she was following or the ground she was digging in, and then jumps into action as she turns in our direction and runs to catch up with us.

As long as Kadesh will listen and obey, she can be free to run and explore.  And we do give her choices within the boundaries.  Just this morning Jim told her, “Kadesh, you can go up this hill on the right, or you can follow the road with us.  But you can’t go down the hill on the left.”  The property on the left is where the poisoned squirrels are.  She chose to stay on the road with us.

Of course she may choose at some point to listen to her doggy flesh nature instead of listening to us, and she may end up with another tummy ache.  But since we now recognize the danger, we are extra vigilant to watch her and warn her and call her away from potentially poisoned squirrels for her protection and safety because we love her.

Kadesh Learns Discipline

Tags

2 Timothy 3:16-17, Disciple, Discipline

You know that word “discipline” that most of us don’t like to think about?  Well, Kadesh found that she didn’t like it either.  At least not at first.

After our experience with Kadesh’s pride, we decided that we had to do something to teach her to better listen and obey.  We had hoped to avoid such a thing, but she didn’t seem to comprehend the importance of the lessons we were trying to teach, and so we resorted to the shock collar.

Several days went by with her listening so well on our walks, that all we had to do was vibrate the collar and she responded.  And then she saw a squirrel.  She took off like a lightning bolt and totally ignored Jim’s call for her to return.  He vibrated the collar.  No change.  So he pushed the shock button.  In response, Kadesh jumped into the air and took off like a lightning bolt as she ran back towards home.  In her panic, she dove through a barbed wire fence and caught her foot on a barb, adding to the frightening, painful experience.  

As we doctored her foot and praised her for coming, she looked at us with uncertainty.  She was smart enough to know that we controlled the pain she felt, but we weren’t sure if she understood why we had hurt her.

The next day, she was one sober doggy on our walk, and she didn’t leave our side.  Over the next couple of days, she ventured out a little more, coming immediately when we called her.  

Kadesh’s Pride

Tags

obedience, Pride, Temptation

Every morning we go for a walk around our ranch.  Kadesh has learned that if she listens to us, she doesn’t have to be on a leash.  She is a large dog, and when she runs, she is fast and graceful, simply majestic.  We love watching her leap down the hills and bound over the rocks.  

This past week, Jim was sick, so it was just the two of us on our morning trek.   Kadesh was very good all week!  I think that because Jim was not with me, she felt extra protective and did not wander far from my side.  I was so proud of her, and her dedication made me feel loved. 

Today Jim came with us.  As we walked down the driveway, it was obvious that Kadesh was glad that we were all together.  She had an extra spring in her usually peppy step as she ran back and forth between Jim and me.  

I should have known something was about to change when she suddenly went through the fence and began to roll in a fresh, wet patch of donkey-dooty.  Now some dogs do this regularly, but Kadesh had never done it before.  Somewhat in shock, I wasn’t thinking too clearly.  We should have turned around right then and headed home.  We should have at least put her on her leash, but still trusting in her good-standing actions from the past week, we let her continue on as usual.